


blindshipping, a poem

by Chicary



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2017-01-18
Packaged: 2018-09-18 11:17:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9382166
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chicary/pseuds/Chicary
Summary: Pharaoh sat upon his throne so high, to chose a mate the time was nigh...





	

Pharaoh sat upon his throne so high.  
To choose a mate, the time was nigh.  
Lined up to the gates the pretty women stood,  
The kind of women that’ll give you morning wood.

But, as always, Pharaoh was bored,  
As the women jingled their decorative chords.  
They were alright, he couldn’t deny,  
Except that Pharaoh was into guys.

One after another they showed off their swag.  
“By the seven Hathors, this is such a drag.”  
But, out of nowhere, they brought in a boy,  
His destiny to be an Ancient Egyptian sex toy.

He was wrapped in linen from head to toe.  
I have no idea why; doubt anyone knows.  
His eyes were big, his body small,  
His hair like Pharaoh’s for no reason at all.

Pharaoh’s interest pique, he waved the girls away,  
Who would have thought his hardened heart could sway?  
Did I mention he was cruel and unkind?  
Well the sight of this boy almost made him go blind!

The boy squeaked and tried to step away,  
As Pharaoh closed in on his prey.  
He knew right away, this boy he’d bone.  
Already under his kilt he was a Toblerone (that is to say, an Ancient Egyptian Toblerone).

He unwrapped the boy all slow and steady.  
By the gods his body was ready.  
When he was done, he couldn’t believe his eyes.  
Right then and there, he thought he’d die.

Porcelain skin and amethyst orbs,  
This was too much to absorb.  
Baby-soft cheeks and the scent of strawberries in his sweat.  
“What even is this thing?” Wondered High Priest Set.

In a tiny voice, the boy said his name.  
Suffice it to say, Pharaoh nearly came.  
He scooped the boy up in his bronze arms.  
“But I’m still a virgin, you can ask my mom.”

“I’ll be gentle, my sweet little angel.”  
Did you know it takes two to tangle?  
Pharaoh slid his hand up the boy’s thigh.  
Mahado rushed to cover Mana’s eyes.

To his bedroom Pharaoh whisked the boy away.  
At this point, no refunds if you’ve already paid.  
“This will be pleasurable, have no fear.”  
-Insert graphic lemon here-

By morning they were still going strong,  
Even though they’d made love all night long.  
“Don’t you need an heir?” There was sadness in the boy’s eyes,  
As he winced from the pain in his behi—

Oh right. Well that’s just craptastic.  
But wait! There’s Ancient Egyptian magic!  
“Mahado will do something about it, I’m sure,”  
Pharaoh all but purred.

Poor Mahado nearly killed himself conjuring a spell,  
But alas, the boy’s belly did swell.  
For nine long months, they bathed in pre-baby bliss.  
Reminding you again, it won’t get better than this.

When birthing time came, it was no surprise,  
That his body had to compromise.  
But safely was delivered a cute baby boy,  
Via methods unexplained did they employ.

There was much rejoicing all through the land,  
Even though the boy nearly lost an endocrine gland.  
We’re almost done, no need to beg.  
Congratulations, you just read mpreg.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on my tumblr.


End file.
